walking with a ghost
by acronymed
Summary: "Stefan! How are you doing? Driven any exes off of bridges their parents died on lately?" — Caroline, Stefan, Elena.


**TITLE. **walking with a ghost.

**FANDOM. **the vampire diaries.

**PAIRING/CHARACTERS. **Caroline+Elena, Caroline+Stefan.

**RATING. **t.

**NOTES. **I actually ship Stefan/Elena _and _Damon/Elena, but I feel like Stefan trying to drive Elena _off the bridge her parents died on _and _turn her into a vampire _was so horrific, awful and traumatic, and it was just skipped over like nbd and hasn't been mentioned since. Apparently Elena's over it? What the hell. And Caroline being out of the loop just bothers me to no end. SHE IS FLAWLESS, GUYS. TELL HER YOUR PROBLEMS~*~

**SUMMARY. **"Stefan! How are you doing? Driven any exes off of bridges their parents died on lately?"

* * *

><p>Elena is crying and still in her dress with black smudged under her eyes. Caroline notes the erratic jump of her pulse and steps aside.<p>

"Stefan's still in there somewhere," she says, thin shoulders shaking under her shawl. Caroline thinks she might be here because she wants to make up for not telling her about Damon.

"Okaaaay." She curls her fingers around Elena's wrist. "Why don't you come inside and tell me about it?"

Elena's eyes are unfocused. She nods once, in a stilted, jerking sort of way that makes Caroline frown. "He tried to drive me off of Wickery Bridge last week."

Caroline pauses, tense. Something cold and aching spreads through her chest, tightens until she can't pretend to breathe anymore. "Oh my god," she finally says, "and you're still trying to save him?"

Eyes wet, Elena nods. Caroline pulls her into her foyer hard, a mix of fury and worry and devastation ripping through her. "_What is wrong with you?_"

"It's Stefan!" Elena looks at her like it means something great and important and Caroline gets it, she does, because she loves Stefan to pieces and she misses him, too, and she knows he is wonderful and kind and all that but seriously. _Seriously. Wickery Bridge?_

"Really, Elena?" she snaps, thumb digging into the fleshy part of Elena's palm, mostly by accident, but maybe a little on purpose. It's better than slapping her, she thinks. "Because you never seem to make that excuse when Damon does something awful."

Elena stutters, all doll features and ruined make up crumpling into something small, child-like, scared. "I don't know what I'm doing anymore, Caroline."

"Well," she tries to sound neutral, but there's a bit of mean girl in her voice, she can hear it, "maybe if you'd, I don't know, _told me _about this stuff earlier, I would have been able to help." She pauses, then, vaguely horrified, goes, "oh my god, and you let me tell you he was the better date choice."

"He _feels, _Caroline." Elena is a little desperate right now, she can tell, from the way she's twisting her hand to catch Caroline's and grasping hard. "He says he doesn't, but I know he does, and he's just afraid because he hates himself so much for what he's done—"

"Good," Caroline says, deadpan, and laces their fingers together. Elena's expression shuts down. "He should feel bad. He tried to kill you, and he wasn't under any compulsion at the time."

"Caroline—"

She shakes her head. "Elena, if he still feels something, like you say he does, then you're saying he felt something when he tried to kill you, and that wasn't enough to make him stop." Her smile is sad. "Whatever he feels for you isn't enough. Period."

Elena pulls away completely and folds into herself, like she used to when they were younger, cradling her arms and tucking her chin into her chest. It reminds Caroline of when they were kids, when things were simple. "I can't believe that," she whispers, words cracking, "I can't, not after everything we've been through. Caroline, _I can't._"

Very gently, Caroline catches Elena's elbows and kisses her forehead, baby hairs soft under her lips. "I'm not saying he doesn't still love you. I'm just saying that you can't keep denying that Stefan isn't the same, and that even after all this stuff has gotten figured out, he won't be the same ever again."

Elena sobs, once, a harsh, choked sort of sound, and presses into Caroline's chest. "I just want to go back to last year." There are black marks where her eyelashes touch Caroline's skin. "I'm so tired, Care."

"I know, sweetheart." Caroline's chin hooks her shoulder easily, just like it had when they were sixteen and breathing. "I think you need a strictly no boys phase."

Elena's laugh is fleeting, but genuine. "No kidding, huh?" She tilts her head so they're cheek to cheek, and says, "I'm sorry I didn't tell you about Damon."

"It's okay." Caroline shrugs. "How is that going, anyway?"

There's a long pause where Elena just breathes softly into her ear and quivers against her with something barely restrained. Then, "I was the worst to him, tonight. I'm the worst thing for him, probably."

"No, that would be Katherine," Caroline mutters, automatic, and Elena pulls back sharply. "What?"

"I'm worse than Katherine," she's terrified, "he told me he loved me and I said it was a problem."

Caroline stares at her, partially in shock, then reaches out and hugs her again. "Oh, Elena."

"I'm the worst!" She's crying again. Caroline hates what these boys do to her. She rubs her back. "The absolute worst."

"You would be if you didn't feel so bad about it, but you do." She reminds herself to pay Damon a visit, and to hunt down Stefan so she can yell at him. "You're a good person, Elena. Your life is just kinda a disaster right now."

"Sometimes I think I'm not." Elena's fingers dig into her spine, almost painful. "Sometimes, I think I'm the exact opposite of one."

Caroline doesn't say anything, just holds her a little tighter, and wonders what their lives would have been like if Elena Gilbert had been born with a different face.

.

.

.

Stefan is surprisingly easy to find. She slips into the seat next to him, silent, and orders a drink. He throws back his shot, slouches over the bar, and says, "Caroline."

"Stefan," she smiles brightly, like she doesn't want to rip him in half. She's never really had the kind of violence in her that Damon or Katherine or even he had, but she might make an exception. "How are you doing? Driven any exes off of bridges their parents died on lately?"

He tenses, and she thinks, _good. _"She told you."

"Of course she told me," she spits, lips curling. She has to inhale hard to keep the veins around her eyes from pulsing. "How could you? After everything, how could you do that to her?"

"I don't need to explain myself to you." He goes to stand. Caroline grabs his arm and slams it off the edge of the counter. The bones snap under her palm. He grits his teeth.

"Actually," she says sweetly, smiling a smile that is all teeth and warning, "you do. So sit down and start talking."

"I'm a lot older than you are," he growls, prying her fingers off of him one by one. She thinks he could break them, but he doesn't, and it's a sign. It's small, but it's a sign.

"Yeah," she says, "but I'm angrier."

Stefan is expressionless, but his eyes flicker. She wonders if Damon told him about their fight. He probably had. "I needed to get the advantage on Klaus." He frowns. "It worked."

"You are such an idiot." She tips back her drink sharply and swallows hard. It's scotch, and it still burns going down. "She still loves you."

Stefan actually seems angry at that. He takes another shot. "Actually, she loves Damon."

There's a moment where Caroline considers correcting him, considers lying to him, because she knows he's right, she just doesn't want him to use it as an excuse. Instead, she mutters, "_actually, _she loves you both. Stupid."

Stefan is quiet. She orders a beer and sips at it, glancing at him every once in a while. Eventually, he sighs. "You still eating bunnies?"

"I decided being a serial killer wasn't my thing," she deadpans. "I'm on blood bags now." She scrunches her nose. "O negative is so gross."

"That's Damon's favourite," Stefan says, almost fondly. Caroline kind of wants him and Damon to just make up already so everything will stop being so tense.

"That explains like, so much." She presses the rim of the bottle against her lower lip when he snorts. "What about you?"

"Me?" He tips his head at her, thoughtful, and she doesn't like the way his eyes darken. "I don't care what kind it is; I just like it warm."

Caroline tries to associate the guy in front of her with the boy who taught her control and hates it when she can't. "Oh."

Maybe Elena wasn't the only one living in denial.

"Did I scare you?" He smirks at her, but in a way that only one side of his mouth kicks up. "I shouldn't. You know you feel the same way."

She does, a little. She can vaguely remember her teeth tearing into an artery, and the way the blood had slid down her throat, so warm and slick and delicious. But it isn't a vivid as it'd been months before. The old Stefan, she thinks, would be proud.

"I do," she admits, tucking her hair behind her ear. Stefan's eyebrows rise. "But not the way you do. Not the way Damon used to." She shrugs. "I think being neurotic helps me deal better."

Stefan doesn't say anything else. They sit there for another hour, in utter silence, with him drinking whiskey straight and her nursing the same beer, and when he throws down enough money to pay for her drinks as well, she smiles.

"You still remind me of someone I used to know," he says, zipping his jacket. For a minute, she thinks he might give her a once over. It's almost affectionate. "You're a lot better than the rest of us, Caroline." He half smiles, in that quiet way he used to. "Maybe you should be the one taking care of Elena."

"I do that already, thanks," she says, and ignores the thrill she gets seeing the flashes of who he used to be, "and I think I'm way better at it than you two nut jobs."

He grins, for a second that seems to go on forever. She sucks in a breath. "Happy belated birthday, Caroline."

She beams. "You owe me a present. It better be amazing."

He shakes his head and leaves.

.

.

.

Elena calls early the next morning; Stefan's locked himself in the boarding house basement to detox.

Caroline goes out hunting, then visits.

"Here." She sets the mug down in front of his cell. "For you."

He scowls at her. One day and he's already aggravated? It's going to be a long few months. "It's bunny blood, don't worry."

"My favourite," he sneers, but takes a sip. Pauses, then, "it's warm."

"I heated it up," she says, like it's not a big deal. Like she isn't trying to help him the way he helped her. Like she doesn't miss him. "Is it okay?"

He stares at her in a way that makes her want to reach out and hug him. "Yeah," he murmurs, shuffling closer to the bars as she sits down. He looks so much younger. "It's perfect."

From the top of the stairs, she can hear Elena and Damon whispering to each other. She can't make out words, but the tones are enough. She bites the inside of her cheek to keep from giggling.

Stefan blinks at her. "What?"

"Nothing," she reaches out and swipes her thumb across his upper lip, where it streaks red. "You are _so_ messy."

He glances at the floor. "You don't have to stay, you know. It's going to get bad soon."

She knows this. "Elena told me." She puts her chin on her knees and watches him drink. "So enjoy that blood, cause it's the last time you're going to taste it for _long_ time buster."

The way Stefan says, "I'm really trying not to," breaks her heart, but she pushes the thought away.

Elena settles next to her when he's sleeping later, and whispers, "thank you."

"For what?" She hooks their arms together. "I didn't do anything."

"Mhm," Elena hums, like she does when she knows someone's lying, "whatever you say, Care."

Caroline hides a smile behind her palm as Elena's head drops onto her shoulder. She watches her watch Stefan's back. Watches Damon watch them from the stairs.

Waits.


End file.
